PLOT CRUNCH: Carpenter’s classic is updated for the 2k era. Some things have changed but its nice to see that one thing will always remain the same: Michael Myers is still in a bad mood and he wants his sister’s blood. Pick up your knife…lets go slaying…

LOWDOWN: From the opening credits with the camera traveling through a row of pumpkins this Arrow knew that he was in for more than just some guy playing around with a camcorder. That shot must of taken so much planning and hard work. When the film was done and the credits had rolled, my initial gut feeling was proven right…this flick is no “Mickey Mouse” operation.

Now there were two ways I could have approached this review. Break it down as a stand-alone flick or compare it to the original. I really wanted to review it as a stand-alone but being that the original is such a strong staple in the genre it would be impossible. I tried to do both…

I was expecting Halloween 2000 to be a shot by shot remake of the Carpenter classic, much like Van Sant did with Psycho. The first half of the film seemed to be heading in that direction. It didn’t stray too far from Carpenter’s vibe and the script also stayed very close (to the Carpenter, Debra Hill script). Yes, we get variations (like the opening murder of Judith by Michael being slightly different than the one in the original) but most of them were minor and it stuck mostly to its source.

But at the halfway point the film pulled a fast one on me. First by letting Annie (Castle) survive her car ordeal (no she doesn’t bite it in the car but we still get the boo scare) but foremost by having Brackett and Lynda get it on together. In this update of Halloween Brackett is not only a servant of the law but he’s also the town’s cherry popper. You got it, he prays on young teen girls and gets his rocks off. How’s that for a departure? That totally took me by surprise and I enjoyed the change. I can’t really say that it makes the film better than the original but for someone who’s seen Carpenter’s classic way too many times (like me) I welcomed the new character layer.

I also dug the 2k updates. Cell phones are prominent in the film (Michael even holds one at a certain point), we get a crack about “Viagra,” we get a reference to “Scream” (when Annie is popping that corn), we get “The Thing” remake playing on the tube instead of the original (Carpenter had the original running on TV) and one addition that really cracked my arse up was the two “Trick Whore Treaters”…I laughed out loud at that one. BTW: Nice touch with the Halloween 3 “Shamrock” commercial getting in there…groovy…

The film plays on our expectations most of the time, especially when it comes to the murder/stalk sequences. One change I appreciated is the exclusion of Annie’s laundry room scene. In the original she gets something on her clothes, strips down and proceeds to walk outside across the yard to the laundry room. Of course Michael is stalking her. I always found that stalk sequence to be overlong and kind of silly. Good call guys.

I was let down big time once: during the Brackett/Lynda murder. I was expecting the “ghost Michael” scene to happen but it didn’t. That scene is a very strong scene in the original and I don’t know why they wrote it out. The murder sequence that follows instead is decent but not near as effective as the one in the original.

The Loomis character played by Joey Watson also slightly hurts the film. Since Loomis is a very important part of the story, Watson’s stale performance took away from the whole…I’ll go more into it in the “acting” section.

When it was all over I really enjoyed this homage to one of my favorite horror flicks. Of course it’s not as suspenseful and tight as the Carpenter classic but it’s competently made, mostly well acted and effective. Take a trip down to Haddonfield with me…again…

ACTING: Lauren Chapman (Laurie) is a cutie pie. She doesn’t fully capture the vulnerability that Jamie Lee Curtis communicated with her portrayal of Laurie Strode but is still very likeable, and sincere. She can go places. I’d date her…in about 4-5 years. Joey Watson (Loomis) had a huge challenge in playing the beloved “Loomis” part and sadly he’s not fully up to it. The man knows his lines but delivers them with half - half conviction and he doesn’t have the passion or the charisma Donald Pleasence gave the part. He also relies way too much on cigarette acting (that’s when an actor is insecure and feels the need to smoke all the time so it gives his hands something to do). Get the patch buddy, those things will kill ya (as I light one up). Joanna Castle (Annie) cranks up the sluttiness and the cocky attitude. She does well most of the time, has great energy but pulls a funny face during her death scene. John Moore (Brackett) is dead on as the horny police officer. He’s very capable and natural. Natalie Jones (Lynda) plays the mega slut and delivers her sexual innuendos like a champ. Jeremy Perkins (Tommy) impressed me. He’s very young and 98 percent of the time I bought his performance. Is that Hollywood I hear knocking? The kid is a natural. Alex Castle (Lindsey) is not as convincing as Perkins but does ok. Is it me or did she stare straight at the camera at a certain point? The dude that plays Michael gets the head tilting right and has the right build…not much I can say…

GORE: The original Halloween wasn’t all too gory and neither is this remake/homage. A lot of people spitting out “Karo” syrup and that’s pretty much all she wrote.

T&A: With two mega tramps in the film I expected some kind of action. But unfortunately Joanna Castle (Annie) doesn’t show her tush when the pants go down and Natalie Jones (Lynda) is all about hugging those bed covers when she’s butt naked…the most action we get is Judith Myers showing off her bra…nice bra…I guess that’s what happens when you don’t pay your actors…should’ve slipped them a couple of quarters to slip those bras off…

DIRECTING: It’s apparent that Ellis did his pre-prod. Every shot is carefully planned, the camera movements are precise and hints of style often surface. This is more than some dude with a camera doing a home movie. This is some dude who wanted to pay homage to one of his favorite movies and put everything he’s got into it. I was very impressed; the film looks very professional and is very moody (loved the occasional slow motion). We get lots of play with lighting and shadows. Be it a flashlight in someone’s face, a tree branch shadowing an actor’s face or pumpkins emanating reddish lighting…the flick looks good. I will be honest…there’s one boo scare that actually made me jump out of my seat…now that’s rare…Two complaints I have about the directing: The first shot of Laurie and the kids watching TV…it’s way too bright!!! 2- The scenes where Michael creeps out of the darkness…are also a bit too bright. Small pet peeves…I know…

SOUNDTRACK: I appreciated the inclusion of “Don’t Fear The Reaper” by Blue Oyster Cult. It worked in the original and it works here. The immortal “Halloween” score is well used and matches the scenes they’re supporting.

BOTTOM LINE: The tricky thing about updating/remaking an old horror flick is the pacing. What worked then can feel slow today (I thought the Psycho remake lagged big time) but here it works. I was never bored, got surprised a few times and appreciated seeing my favorite scenes in new ways (happy they kept the classic Michael rising behind Laurie scene in there…brrr). Halloween 2000 is a very good homage to Halloween and the filmmaker (and everybody involved) should be proud of his accomplishment. Now hopefully he’ll get an original script going, more money and make HIS horror flick. Looking forward to reviewing that one.

BULLSEYE: In the end credits, someone is credited to have played Jason Voorhees. For the life of me I can’t remember seeing the dude in the film.

Nick Castle played Michael in the original. Joanna Castle plays Annie…any relation?

Is Lauren Chapman single?